Sunday, March 22, 2009

Something's Going On...

Been sleeping a LOT this weekend. Could have to do with arriving back in California around 1 am Sat morning and then staying up to watch the Battlestar Galactica 2 hour final episode. I woke up on Saturday, but then went back to bed in the afternoon and slept a lot, and could not bring myself to go to a local bar for a friend's birthday in the evening.
Today, when I felt the same way, I also tried to at least do some meditation, and reading as well.

I don't feel emotional so much as this vague feeling of being depressed/oppressed/anxious...but then I have to realize those ARE emotions. And it occurs to me, that having just seen my parents, and my dad being sick right now--his blood counts were too low to have chemo for the second time while I was there--and the fact that my own scans start tomorrow, I probably have a lot churning around inside, and it probably affects me more than I realize. So even though it feels a bit like slacking, I'm trying to honor that, and let myself just sit if that's what I need to do. I've got the bare minimum done for homework for tomorrow, and even less for my Wed and Friday deadlines, but I just have to trust that if I work with this inner stuff, that the energy to do the other stuff will re-emerge in time.

1 comment:

  1. i'm glad to read you are acknowledging and validating your own emotions and feelings. sleep isn't a bad thing (as long as it doesn't become a coping mechanism).

    I hope you're feeling better. Hopefully ballet will help!